As noted in Suetonius’s last post, government lackeys will be going door-to-door asking residents to voluntarily turn over their first born sons…or I mean asking permission to search homes for contraband. The terror that such action strikes in the hearts of liberty lubbers should reverberate well beyond the borders of the district. But any action needs to emanate from D.C.

My suggestion: Let’s help them.

Make their job a little easier by letting them know ahead of time that you do NOT give them permission to search your home. I suggest putting a red sash on your door, signifying that the cops can Passover your residence.

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Filed under: Politics is Personal, Jesus is Magic, The Homeland

We mock the G-town set because it’s the easy thing to do. But they have a big heart, too. (Granted, it’s just the one heart, they have to share it collectively among them, and it was ripped from the still-beating chest of a Haitian immigrant mother with AIDS, but hey, it’s a start.)

For instance, did you know that some poor black children don’t even get the chance to play polo? Well, it’s true. There is a notable surfeit of ponies in the ‘hood. Thankfully, the good folks at the First Chukker Foundation are about to change all that.

Devoted to, as they put it: “positive social and environmental change as well as the increasing awareness of Polo in the Greater Washington Metropolitan Region,” the upChukkers are all about bringing the ultimate symbol of overentitled prep school dipwadosity within grasp of the common man.

And they were in full force Friday night with a charity benefit at Georgetown’s hyper-exclusive City Tavern Club (how exclusive, you ask? well, Ole G.W. hisself, along with his boys T.J., notorious for his raging case of jungle fever, and Johnny “Sweet Dick” Adams once chilled in this crib, though Jefferson was known to flout the “coat and tie required at all times” dress code by parading around sans pantaloons)

So, yes, for a whole night, several hundred of G-town’s finest rocked ascots in both Crip Blue and Blood Red, while debs shaked they phat asses to the in-house entertainment, “raisin’ the roof” and “droppin’ it like it’s hot,” whilst adorned in the de rigeur uniform of short black minidresses and vinyl boots from the Heidi Fleiss collection.

All for the cause of introducing poor kids to a sport they’ll almost certainly never be able to afford, and for which there exist no college scholarships of note.

Now, don’t get us wrong. We like charity. Charity, it need not be said, is a good thing. But witnessing the self-parody of this particularly retarded charity leads one to conclude these people are either completely, almost inconceivably clueless, or they possess a level of condescending cruelty that would make Blofeld himself blush.

Or, given that it’s Georgetown…perhaps a little from Column A, a little from Column B.

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Filed under: Politics is Personal, Pop! Goes the Culture, The Homeland

Citizens of Milwaukee have decided to erect a bronze statue in honor of Milwaukee’s coolest, perhaps most famous, and certainly fictional citizen: Arthur Fonzarelli. Private groups banded together and raised private money — to a tune of $85,000 — to boost tourism and, well, be cool.

The Fonz is just too cool to be funded by tax money.

A big “Aaaaaaaayyyyyy” to Fark for the link.

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Filed under: The Homeland

Are you liberals happy?

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Filed under: The Homeland

I’m all for Free Speech and don’t think the people who organized this — or those who sign it — should be put on a terrorism watch list, but let’s be real now:

To: All those currently exercising positions of responsibility in the Government of the United States of America, whether elected or appointed, and whether at the federal, state, or local level

Whereas the United States Government’s claim to legitimacy is purportedly based on such principles as the consent of the governed, human equality, and the inalienable rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness; and

Whereas few if any of those over whom you claim authority have ever consented to such governance; and

Whereas governments, as claimants to such authority over others, are by their nature inconsistent with human equality; and

Whereas your laws, ordinances, decrees, and policies generally stand in violation, directly or indirectly, of the rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness;

We, the undersigned, hereby demand:

That you cease to claim to be acting in our name or as our agents; and

That you cease all attempts to exercise authority over your fellow human beings, on this continent or elsewhere; and

That you work to dismantle the institution or set of institutions known as the Government of the United States of America, in every branch and at every level, as speedily as possible; and

That you make no attempt to interfere with its replacement by voluntary associations of free and equal individuals.

Sincerely,

The Undersigned

Although, it does beg the question why anarchists would even bother to petition an entity they don’t think is legitimate. Such an action is akin to Iran sending Israel a cease and desist order of existence.

No word yet from the Government on whether it has decided to disestablish itself.

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Filed under: Politics is Personal, Freedom Meets Darwin, Profiles in Governance, The Homeland

There are many things the FBI is incapable of doing — add paying the phone bill to the list:

Telephone companies have cut off FBI wiretaps used to eavesdrop on suspected criminals because of the bureau’s repeated failures to pay phone bills on time.

A Justice Department audit released Thursday blamed the lost connections on the FBI’s lax oversight of money used in undercover investigations. In one office alone, unpaid costs for wiretaps from one phone company totaled $66,000.

…

More than half of 990 bills to pay for telecommunication surveillance in five unidentified FBI field offices were not paid on time, the report shows.

Money quote:

[F]ormer FBI agent Michael German, the ACLU’s national security policy counsel [said] “To put it bluntly, it sounds as though the telecoms believe it when the FBI says the warrant is in the mail but not when they say the check is in the mail.”

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Filed under: Profiles in Governance, The Homeland

Well done, Arizona. With your new employer-sanctions law, which threatens to suspend–or revoke–the business licenses of employers who knowing hire illegal immigrants, you’ve made Mexico a pleasanter alternative to America. Right on.

From CNN:

State Rep. Russell Pearce of Mesa, the author of the employer sanctions law, said his intent was to drive illegal immigrants out of Arizona.

“I’m hoping they will self-deport,” Pearce said. “They broke the law. They’re criminals.”

[…]

When immigrants don’t have jobs, they don’t stick around, said Dawn McLaren, a research economist at Arizona State University who specializes in illegal immigration. She said the flagging economy, particularly in the construction industry, also is contributing to an immigrant exodus.

“As the jobs dwindle and the environment becomes more unpleasant in more ways than one, you then decide what to do, and perhaps leaving looks like a good idea,” she said. “And certainly that creates a problem, because as people leave, they take the jobs they created with them.”

One such immigrant in the story is Martin Herrera, a masonry worker who lives in Camp Verde, AZ:

“I don’t want to live here because of the new law and the oppressive environment,” he said. “I’ll be better in my country.”

He called the employer-sanctions law “absurd.”

“Everybody here, legally or illegally, we are part of a motor that makes this country run,” Herrera said. “Once we leave, the motor is going to start to slow down.”

Now for the jaw-dropper:

[Rep.] Pearce disagreed that the Arizona economy will suffer after illegal immigrants leave, saying there will be less crime, lower taxes, less congestion, smaller classroom sizes and shorter lines in emergency rooms.

“We have a free market. It’ll adjust,” he said. “Americans will be much better off.”

Yes, of course, a free market! Where the state can revoke your business license, where labor supply and labor demand never meet, and where, come spring, some rich folk are gonna be mighty peeved at the cost of landscaping. Frrrreeedom!

Um, I’d sort of rather have Martin Herrara as my state representative. He seems to have a much better grasp of the fundamentals of economics; but I find that people who actually work for a living often do.

Hat tip (or thumbed nose, I guess) to RedState, where my favorite comment so far is this one:

The millions of Americans who fought the McCain-Kennedy amnesty were right as well.

We were called racist’s, nativist’s etc. but we didn’t care we fought hard and stopped the Congress and the President.

The beauty of that win was that the state’s could than do what was right and not be usurped by the government.

Freedom of Religion not Freedom from Religion

[sic] all over. Racist’s what? Nativist’s what? State’s what? Racist’s handbags? Nativist’s Trapper Keepers? State’s ice cream cones?

I’m dying to know what all the unidentified possessed nouns in that sentence are.

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Filed under: The Dismal Science, Profiles in Governance, The Homeland

It’s all over, folks. The Great Immigration Debate has come to an end, and the illegals won. In case you haven’t heard, Tom Tancredo has dropped out of the race for the Republican presidential nomination, throwing all of his native-born support to “Catcher” Mitt Romney. Naturally, though, there are two sides to the story.

On the downside, our nation is now on an unstoppable slide toward a cultural nightmare in which Mexican-speaking people will be free to do things previously reserved for real Americans like drive cars and order Philly cheese steaks. Chilling, I agree. On the upside, the real pools of Orange County will continue to sparkle, as will the china and stemware at fine dining establishments across the nation. Basically, it’ll be rough on people who no habla the espanol, but good for those looking for cheap nannies and an elegantly plated cheese course. You people know who you are.

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Filed under: The Homeland

Favorite Line: “I don’t know we made brownies. And i think we’re dead.”

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Filed under: Profiles in Governance, The Homeland

The police in Ohio are offering a new service this holiday season. If you give them your child they will give you a complimentary tazing on the back of your neck (while supplies last). Here is the latest example:

Happy holidays!

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Filed under: The Homeland